Despite modern repulsions to the concept, dominance and submission are natural, healthy aspects of human social dynamics. While it can become imbalanced through structure breakdown from above or a lack of gratitude for stability from below, it is the main way we foster cooperation and coordination. In that way, it is at the core of our success as a society.
Today, let’s explore the dominance/submission social structure and how it has helped us get this far. Hopefully we can gain a new appreciation for the roles that we all take part in.
While the terms dom and sub often brings to mind sexual relationships, it is important to note that dominant-submissive dynamics can exist in a variety of social relationships. Here are some examples of non-sexual dom-sub social relationships:
Breadwinner/nestmaker, Head of household/Everyone else, Parent/child, Teacher/student, Senpai/kohai, Mentor/mentee, Coach/athlete, Priest/parishioner, Boss/employee, Team Captain/teammate. Caretaker/patient, Expert/client, Sibling/sibling, Contractor/client, Landlord/tenant, Military, Waden/prisoner, Politicians/citizens, Lawyer/client, Doctor/patient, The tallest or richest guy in the group/everyone else,
The system works to elevate the value, wealth, status, safety, of participants. Without submissive cooperation, achieving large goals can be difficult. Without dominant leadership, nothing will be accomplished. Dominants do not need cooperation to survive, they have the ability to force their will, but it helps make things more civil for everyone. The ability to submit is a psychological skill that helps us be social animals. It also devalues violence as the primary currency, hence why violence is frowned upon in modern times.
Due to biology, throughout human history, the dominant man, and submissive woman was the standard. In modern times, tradition still dictates that dynamic, but everyone has an equal opportunity to build their king/queen/theydom. Female domination is now commonplace throughout society, although separate spheres of control still exist. As more leadership blueprints/role models become culturally available, more people will explore both levels of the dynamic - the spheres will become Ven diagrams.
Submission is inevitable, not weakness
Submission is necessary for social order and stability. When individuals submit to authority, it allows for a sense of organization, predictability, and consistency in how people interact with one another. In a healthy dynamic, submission is often reciprocated with support, guidance, and protection from the dominant individual, which can lead to a more fulfilling and safe relationship for both parties involved.
It is important to note that submission is not the same as being powerless or passive. Even dominants submit to someone else in certain situations. Submission is about acknowledging and respecting the authority of the dominant individual and recognizing that there are times when it is appropriate and necessary to defer to their judgment or direction.
Even the most in control Dom has an elder, teacher, or mentor they bed the knee too, gladly. Often submission is earned or given as a gift in appreciation for what that person does for you. No one is entitled to have someone else solve their problems, give them money, fuck them, feed their belly, or deal with them at all.
All life forms are submissive to nature. In a more abstract sense, our consciousnesses are submissive to our brains and bodies. If you don’t fulfill the needs, you die. Plus, at the end of the day, time will bind and gag us all. Submission is inevitable, not weakness.
Dominance is a right, reward, & responsibility
Every person has the right to self-determination and the ability to make decisions for themselves. In this sense, every individual has the potential to be dominant over their own life and their own choices. This means that individuals can make decisions that are in their best interest and to pursue their own goals and desires. At the same time, being able to effectively manage oneself and take responsibility for one's own actions can be seen as a form of reward in certain contexts.
When individuals demonstrate the ability to follow rules and handle responsibilities, they may earn a greater degree of autonomy and control over their own lives. For example, in a workplace, an employee who consistently meets their job requirements and responsibilities may be given greater control over their work or may be promoted to a position with greater decision-making power. If you break the law, you get dominated by the legal system. If teens show responsible behavior, they get more dominance over their life choices. If you break your social contract, you may lose your dominion or life.
For many people in society, they feel like submission is forced upon or inevitable simply because they have limited choices. Often they haven’t earned the right or reward of dominance. Although, many may try to break this natural law, it’s simply not possible. If you waffle through life, you’ll be less valuable personally, professionally, and romantically. If you compete successfully and follow the rules, you will typically be rewarded with a dominion of your own (sizes may vary). But even once you get the rewards, they all come with responsibility to maintain them.
Dominance and submission are natural, healthy aspects of human social dynamics that have helped us achieve success as a society. While dominant-submissive relationships can become imbalanced, they are necessary for fostering cooperation and coordination. Submission is necessary for social order and stability, while dominance is a right and a reward for following rules and handling responsibilities. In a healthy dynamic, submission is often reciprocated with support, guidance, and protection from the dominant individual, leading to a more fulfilling and safe relationship for both parties involved.
While there are examples of dominant-submissive relationships in various social contexts, it's important to note that submission is not the same as being powerless or passive, and everyone has the potential to be dominant over their own life and choices. Ultimately, the ability to navigate dominant-submissive relationships with mutual respect and reciprocity is a valuable skill that can lead to personal, professional, and romantic success.