Let’s face it behind the smiles, moisturized skin, and closed doors we are all dealing with our own shit. We like to ignore our mental health. Push through our thoughts and emotions to function. I used to think I was chronically sad. I thought dreadful things were just inevitable. I was okay with feeling simply good enough to survive. Until I woke up one day and decided I don’t want to JUST function.
I don’t want to JUST survive. I want to thrive. I want to love my life even on the days everything goes wrong. I’m not living to work or living to go to school. I am more than a student or an employee. I’m here to thrive to cultivate a life I love. I want to wake up on my bad days and still love this life endlessly.
Self-care is hard. Making yourself a priority is hard. So let me tell you how I make it work. Coming from your super anxious and moody depressed bestie with a dash of PTSD and loads of body dysmorphia. I make this look good. Well as best as I can. I’m here to stress the importance of routine, affirmations, and self motherfucking love.
Finding a routine
I wake up every morning and do the things I love. I start my day by waking up and making my bed. I start my day productive. One thing off my to do list complete. I brush my teeth. I do my Butter’s face routine and I really take my time massaging the products in my skin. I spend some time doing my daily affirmations. Then I give myself options as to what I’m going to do next.
Sometimes I’ll wake up and read 20 pages of book or my favorite poem. Other mornings I spend time with favorite crystals. Some mornings I do a little yoga. My favorite mornings, I sketch a little. Spend some time doing what you love what makes you happy. What are your favorite things and how can you incorporate them in them morning?
I mentioned my affirmations previously, but this is what I noticed made the biggest difference in my life. Affirmations are powerful POSITIVE statements that free us from our doubts and worries. I can be something simple “I am going to have a good day today.” I used to write on my test and exams “You are going to do great!” Now, I start every day by looking in the mirror and telling myself I’m a bad bitch until I mean it.
Even with tears flowing down my face and my wig on sideways. I look at myself and say, “I am bad bitch”. I reassure myself “I am where I am supposed to be”. I remind myself “I don’t chase, I attract. What’s meant for me will find me”. The universe hears every word you say let’s stop vocalizing our insecurities and start manifesting some positive affirmations. What are some insecurities our doubts you have? How can we rewire our brain to create a more positive life? If we can convince ourselves, we aren’t good enough, we can absolutely affirm ourselves into our best selves.
Learn to love yourself
Are we familiar with our love languages? We aren’t we practicing them on ourselves on the regular. We already talked about word of affirmations. We have four others. Quality time, Acts of service, receiving gifts, and physical touch. Spending quality time with yourself can be binge watching your favorite show or setting some time to do your favorite hobbies. Those mental to do list you can transcribe and every task complete is an active of service for yourself. See why I make my bed every morning? Treat yourself, buy yourself gifts.
My personal love language is physical touch. You don’t need another person to practice this. Get more hands on in the shower. Spend more time massaging your favorite butters and oils into your skin. I like spending quality time with our Cocoa Butter Lube when I am feeling frisky. Practice loving yourself. Love yourself emotionally, physically, and out loud.
Self-care and self-love aren’t a cake walk. It is something that needs to be practiced and perfected. If something isn’t working for you reflect and make changes. Keep altering your routine until you are excited to wake up in the morning. Yell those affirmations from the roof top. Those love languages you are trying to teach your partner about, Practice them on you. Self-love is the best love. Let’s agree to stop living to function and start living to thrive.